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Tuesday, August 20, 2013

Happens for a reason? Not always. (Part one and a half continued)

...The best method for me to get my insurance booklet to the agency is via snail mail.  I asked the agency for the address to send the booklet to.  I didn't hear back.  For days.  The day I heard back, I had *just* returned from my lunch break.  My plan was to go to the post office the next day and send my booklet over.

The next day came and there was a conflict.  For the rest of the week, there was a conflict.  I couldn't get to the post office! 

FINALLY!  Wednesday comes and I can go to the post office during my break.  I have my day completely planned out... when I realize my husband and I have switched cars for the day and my booklet was in the other car.  UGH!

That very same day, a friend directed me to an Instagram post.  It was a post by a young lady who has been having troubles getting pregnant but wants a baby so bad.  My friend tagged me in this post because she thought maybe I could carry this woman's baby but what I got out of this post was so. much. more.  Despite this woman's inabilities to get pregnant, she had so much faith!  It brought me to tears, reading about how her fertility treatments keep failing but it also brought me so much joy reading that she is still praising God - even when things don't seem like they will work out.

Questions.  Flooding my brain.  Is there a reason I haven't been able to find time to send my booklet?  Is there a reason my friend led me to her Instagram post?

I took the initiative.  I am not known for being bold.  But I did it.  I emailed her.  I told her my story.  I told her how touched I was by her story and how amazing her faith is.  I told her that if she and her husband chose to have someone carry their child that they could contact me.

I didn't expect a response but she responded a few hours later.

Kimmie ::

Thank you for your perfectly worded email. You approached the subject with such grace and respect. Thank you again. 

Unfortunately we are not interested in pursuing a surrogacy, I want nothing more than to experience each part of pregnancy as much as it might be challenging at times. We are going to continue this road as the Lord guides us and pray and hope that it is in His will for us to have our own children. I do have so many friends in this same icky infertility journey and will keep my ears open if you would like and I could connect you. Just let me know. 

Again, Kimmie your heart. SO sweet and awesome. Thank you.
 
Sometimes, you just have to be bold and see what happens.  I didn't feel rejected.  I don't know what will come out of the emails - whether or not her friends will contact me.  But I do know some part of me was led to email her.  And I did.
 
The ending to that story?  I mailed my insurance booklet to the agency.  They have received it and are reviewing it.  
 
I got insight.  I got perspective.  I got the option of doing a private surrogacy got instilled in my brain.