More Homework

Homework:  Talk to someone very involved in the pro life community and get information about the different processes.  |  I had a meeting a couple of weeks ago with a woman in our church who is very involved in the pro life community.  I learned A LOT!  

I want to be a surrogate mother to bring life to a family who can't have kids.  To bring happiness to people who can't carry a child, for whatever reason.  

My understanding of IVF prior to the meeting:
IVF.  In Vitro Fertilization.  Embryos are made in a Petri dish and implanted into someone and the baby grows inside of them.  On average, not more than 3-4 implanted.  I have already told the agency I will not be a part of selective reduction so everything is good.

What I learned at my meeting:
IVF Process:  10-30 eggs are placed in a Petri dish with sperm.  Many of these turn into embryos and are watched for 3-5 days.  After 3-5 days, a number of them (but not all) are implanted.  The parents of the embryos who are not implanted have different options: 

• Donate to stem cell research
• Freeze them
• Discard them

Wow.  I want to be a surrogate mother to bring life to a family who can't have kids.  I do not want to end life for the ones who didn't get selected.  Wow.  This is a lot to digest.

I voiced my concerns to the agency.

Hi Kimberly, 

You understand the process correct; and I understand your concerns. I want to add a bit more "food for thought" if you will...

-While 10-30 eggs are retrieved a majority of them aren't fertilized due to being immature. Then those that are fertilized only the strongest embryos make it to transfer date. Many of them stop developing naturally. We literally see this in the lab but in nature we don't because its "inside" but studies indicate that 1/4 pregnancies are chemical which would be the same scenario (the embryo fails to develop) but in the womb. With that said the number of cycles that end with frozen embryos isn't as high as it may seem and then the number of embryos frozen is typically low. For example for my first surrogacy we retrieved 28 eggs, about 20 of them fertilized and on day 5 we had 7 embryos left. We transferred 2 and the remaining 5 are still frozen (11 years later). 

Keep in mind that these embryos are going to be created or have already been created regardless if you decide to become a surrogate mother or not. But if you DO decide to carry you will be the caring person to possibly help give those embryos life. 

Maybe to help ease your conscious you could only match with a couple who already has frozen embryos. Therefore you can rest assured you are not party of any procedures that would be creating life with the possibility of not giving that life a chance to grow. The life is already created and has "no where to go"

We have matched a lot of pro life surrogates but I think this concern is a first so I hope I was helpful in your soul searching and decision making. 

Talk soon,

Again, overjoyed.  To be able to help a frozen embryo grow.  To bring life to a baby who has already been created.

I need to say Thank You!  To everyone who has made me dig deeper and get answers and do research.  I'm feeling very blessed today.

-Kimmie